Spider nest and Hayate
by otahotian
Summary: <html><head></head>2nd in the Green Line. Follows after Lazy Afternoon. "I can't believe you aren't jounin yet.You are so crazy you could make a Hokage.." "They have yet to see my bright side and my genial mind!" "Lucky them.." What would our favourite pranksters do, when the polite jounin asks them for help with a prank?</html>


**I was told I am loved ^^ so I wrote something like a sequel to the Lazy afternoon - you will see how their last prank worked.  
>warning: It's kind of dark, darker then the first oneshot, but I hope you will like it, still. The time is about two weeks before the chuunin exam, because I got depressed about Hayate's death and decided, he would be still alive here. (:<br>**

* * *

><p>"Hey, c'mon, it <em>was<em> funny." moaned one of the three people standing on a corridor inside of Hokage building. The two of them were waiting for their shift in Mission room to start, while the last was just bored, so he decided to filter his frustration.  
>"No, it wasn't. It was plain stupid." growled the bored one and leaned closer to other guy, almost touching his wild black hair with his forehead. He found it a good idea, how to get an information inside of his friend's head.<p>

"It was Iruka's idea." said the third of them, finally joining the conversation. "And would you please give Kotetsu little bit of a space to breath?" he asked sweetly, but in his eyes was visible spark of deviance.

"Ok, ok." said the bored one, chewing on some steel needle. "Backing up." he rolled his eyes, but took a step back, nevertheless. "And why should I care it was Iruka's idea? And why, what more, should I _believe_ it was Iruka's idea?" he frowned. The two of them were just probably trying to blame someone else, it wasn't possible for Iruka to be so.. evil? Yes, in some way, the thing they did was evil.

"Oh come on! Don't give me that 'too innocent' shit, too." Kotetsu moaned again, it was just soo _unfair._ Why did everyone think that Iruka was saint? He was the worst. Always the prankster.

Genma just raised his eyebrow. "Honestly, what were you two _thinking_? I had a mission with Hatake the day after _that_. Did you honestly had to come up with a way, how to make him even _more_ paranoid?" his voice was starting to raise with every world he said, and he still did manage to stress some of them. How, oh Kami-sama _how_, was he supposed to get some maturity inside of their thick heads?

"Paranoid? I think you are overreacting, Genma-kun.." said Izumo mildly, it was just a prank, there was nothing serious or dangerous with it.

"_Overreacted?_" Genma moaned and looked up to the ceiling, silently praying to Kami for some support. Like more of patience, about the same amount as Iruka had, or just a lightning bolt just to his soon-to-be lifeless body. Or, even better, to those two hellions, who insisted on making his life _hell_.

Izumo hesitantly nodded. He was watching his long time friend with a worried expression, it seemed like the jounin was finally loosing it.

Not like he wasn't crazy before – hell, he was chewing on a _poisoned needle._

"It was just a paper." Kotetsu shook his head, he didn't understand, why was Genma so angry.  
>"Yes. But, even in a ninja village, there are people, who would believe <em>everything<em> they see written.." mumbled Genma. He didn't get how anyone could believe _that_, but .. well, whatever. It wasn't his job to worry about that.

"Don't tell me.." Izumo was mortified. Genma just nodded. "Someone believed, that Kakashi-san was going to copy his.. ehm.. backside?" he asked just to be sure. Genma nodded again.

"Holy sh...Kazekage's pants." Kotetsu breathed out, in obvious attempt to sound funny. He failed, once more.

"Ehm.. what did the people did?" asked Izumo carefully. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to know.

"Oh.. it.. it varies.." Genma took a deep breath and looked around to make sure no-one was listening. "Some of them, mostly young ladies-" Kotetsu grumbled something witch sound suspiciously like lady-dogs. "-those young ladies and, what more even some shinobi, like Gai-sensei, were trying to force him to actually _do_ so. Kakashi, of course, didn't know what were they talking about."

"You are kidding.." was Kotetsu's resort.

"No."

"That's actually kinda scary.." mumbled the cat-looking chuunin. Izumo nodded in his agreement.

"Well, some of them didn't take it serious, but – and that's interesting – _no one, _I repeat, _no one_, told him what is going on.."

"Hmm.. no surprise here.. People are scared of him, they won't talk to him, if not necessary." Kotetsu shrugged.

"Yeah, I guess.." Genma scratched the back of his head. "But some of them were really bad.. It was the most common reaction – they believed it, and they were afraid he would do so.. so they were careful not to show him their – how you called it – backside." Genma sighed.

"Well.. damn." Kotetsu laughed nervously. "_That_ can get on your nerves."

"Yeah.. When I met him for our mission, he still had the paper so I took it of off his back.. And it took me three hours, to make him calm down, so we could start.." Genma was frowning again.

"Alright, We are sorry. We didn't mean any harm." said Izumo silently. "We won't do it again.." he added and whispered silent: "..not when he is before any mission.." to himself and Kotetsu. He got an idea. And he will have to ask Iruka for help. Kotetsu was in, he always was.

Genma sighed. He wouldn't be able to be angry on them. Not when they were looking at him with those pleading expressions, looking like innocence itself.

"...'s okay..." he mumbled. "Just don't do it again.."

* * *

><p>The first part of their shift was quickly over.<p>

"Lunch..?" asked Izumo hesitantly a looked left towards white wall, where the clock was. It was already half past twelve, almost start of their second part of shift, but this time, Iruka would be there, too. The afternoons were always more hectic – there were more jounin, chuunin and teams, who returned from a mission.

"I guess.." Kotetsu mumbled and destroyed the paper sculpture, he was working on for the past two hours. "I will go get some ramen or something.."

Izumo gratefully nodded. "And take one for Ruka, too. He will be tired and hungry."

* * *

><p>The bell rang. Its sound was like a spell, the group of thirty pre-genins started cheering after hearing it and their sensei let out sigh of relief. In these moments, he couldn't help but thank every god he knew, that he was still alive.<p>

"Alright class. You are free for today!" Iruka gave them his sweet smile and his last words: "Be safe on your way home." were lost in the voices of his students.

When finally even the last pre-genin left the room, Iruka packed his papers and decided to head towards the mission room. His shift was still long before started, but he can at least talk to his two friends and help them live trough the torture.

He wasn't really paying attention to his surroundings, looking trough the tests his children wrote that day, so he didn't see the jounin standing there and leaning against wall, until said man coughed to his fist.

Iruka almost jumped from his skin. He hated being sneaked on. Not like the jounin was sneaking, but he was so damn silent every time. Even his cough was silent and decent.

"Hello, Hayate-san. Didn't see you there.." said Iruka and awkwardly scratched his scar.

"Iruka-sensei, I am very sorry to disturb you.." was Hayate's answer. The jounin tried to smile on his kind-of-friend but it was difficult trough his coughing fit.

"Oh, Hayate-san, c'mere. I will make you some tea.." Iruka started pulling the shaking jounin towards the mission room and Hayate obeyed. He didn't have anything to do, his fiancee was on a mission, so he can as well hang with the crazy trio who called themselves chuunins.

* * *

><p>Their arrival in the mission room was as silent as the rest of their travel. The only one there was Izumo, looking like sleeping with his head on the table.<p>

Iruka smiled on his peaceful friend and couldn't help but look at his companion – Hayate was suspiciously looking around as if looking for some danger. Obviously, once ANBU, always ANBU.

"Sit down, I will make the tea.. and try not to wake Zumo – I mean, Izumo – up." Iruka nodded towards the other chuunin and turned around to leave.

"Wait, Iruka-sensei.." Iruka waited patiently for other coughing fit to leave the older man. "Weren't there two of them..?" was Hayate's hesitant question.

Iruka opened his mouth to reply, but was silenced with another voice coming from the door: "There were, there are, and there will always be THREE of us!" shouted Kotetsu melodramatically and jumped in front of the startled jounin. "Here am I! At your service, mylady!"

Hayate blinked. Since when was he lady? He blamed his ears. Maybe he should pay a visit to Tsunade.

"You are crazy Ko. And I was sleeping. _Was_ is the keyword here, you loud bastard." mumbled Izumo sleepily and Iruka decided it's right time to leave. He exited the room silently, hoping no one will notice him and call him back.

"Well, good morning, sunshine." smiled Kotetsu slyly. Izumo decided, his dark-haired friend was evil. Evil and insane.

"I can't believe you aren't jounin yet. You are so crazy you could make a Hokage.."

"Oooh well, but they have yet to see my _bright_ side and my _genial _mind!" Kotetsu was obviously very satisfied with himself.

"Lucky them.." It seemed that just then, did Izumo spotted the jounin sitting on the chair left from door, his back towards plain wall. "Holly shit." he said. He hoped Hayate didn't hear his jokes on jounin. He was one of them, after all. And he guess jounin wouldn't be so happy if they knew, what were they saying about them.  
>Genma didn't count – Genma was insane.<p>

"That is no way to speak to young lady!" moaned Kotetsu disaprovingaly.

Izumo blinked. "It's a guy, Ko.." he titled his head. Was his friend losing it for sure, now?

"Nonsence!"

By that time, the two chuunin were standing face to face with the table between them. Izumo leaned down to see the jounin, who was still watching them.

"Gekkou-san, did you, like, need something?" he asked, curiosity taking the better of him.

Hayate shook his head to clear his mind. "No, I was just meaning to speak with Iruka-sensei, and he kindly invited me for a tea." was his answer. He smiled, happy, that the sentence wasn't interrupted with coughing this time. It was probably the longest sentence he said since.. well since a long time ago.

Izumo nodded with satisfaction and got back to his staring contest with Kotetsu, Hayate being happily forgotten. He sighed and picked up some random paper from the table meaning to busy himself with reading.

He took the sheet delicately between his fingers and stared for a while. Then turned it around. And to the left and once more upside down. He raised his eyebrows and lifted the paper towards the window, trying if maybe it would make more sense reading trough, using the sunlight.

He spotted few small words written on the up side of the sheet, which were the instruction to 'write your name here, please', so he knew he had the right side up. His brows furrowed in concentration, trying to remember all those things someone told him about codes, but still the message didn't make sense. He was thinking about connecting the dots. Maybe it would make a picture.

Hayate started to smile, it will do it, he will at least try.

Damn.

There weren't dots.

Not one.

And it still didn't make sense.

Maybe if he bang the wall with his head, it will help.

He looked around searching for some wall. There was one, looking really bang-able.

Hayate smiled and started to lean towards the wall, softly touching it with his palm first and leaning closely. The paper was still in his hand.

"I wouldn't try that.." came soft voice from the doorway, which went unnoticed by the two glaring devils. Hayate turned around and saw Iruka holding a cup of seemingly warm tea.

"Try what.." he asked hesitantly. Try banging his head?

"Reading the report.." responded Iruka with smile, as if reading his mind. He stepped closer to the jounin and laid the mug on table. "Here you go."

"Thank you.." Hayate smiled gratefully. "Why shouldn't I, though?" he asked curiously.

Iruka rolled his eyes. "I spent all last night trying to decode it. And failed. I guess I will have to try harder today." The teacher let out a sigh of a long suffering saint.

"Is that so.." Hayate said softly and took a sip of his tea. It was little bit sweet and had very nice smell, some herbs, probably. And it tasted great, too.

"Yeah.. I sometimes wonder how come some jounin write even worse than Ruka's little munchkins!" came the shouted reply of Kotetsu, who took sudden interest in the conversation.

"Whose .. report is it?" asked Hayate, little hesitating before calling the paper that. It looked like something cat would write.

Iruka sighed again and sat down on some random chair facing the room. He tried to rub his hand trough his hair, as he was used to do when he was tired, but got stopped by his tight ponytail.

"Hatake's.." the teacher said silently, so that even Hayate sitting close to him had a difficulty hearing him. He took in sharp breath. Oh. Hatake. Well, that explained it.

Hayate warily returned the report back on the small table and kept quiet, while enjoying his tea. It was really heaven for his throat.

* * *

><p>By the time Iruka was done grading his children's tests, Hayate has still his nose buried in the mug, not once did he start the conversation. Didn't he say he needed something? Iruka shrugged and looked towards his team mates. He chuckled softly – they were back to their favorite work-activity. Just this time they were both sleeping, instead of Kotetsu drawing random pictures everywhere.<p>

He decided he can as well try to read the report Kakashi-sensei left him yesterday. Maybe if he could get help from Genma-san, he would be able to put the story behind that mission together, so there will be no need to read that. If just that damn jounin would show up.

"..damned jounin.. they are everywhere when they are just a pain in the ass, but when someone need them.." he cursed silently hoping no one would hear him. Really.. not like everyone thought he was a saint, but he was still a teacher.

"..Did I do anything to offend you, Iruka-sensei?" came soft voice from his right.

Damn. He forgot Hayate-san was still there.

"Erm.. eh.. no.. It wasn't about you, Hayate-san.." Iruka laughed nervously.

"Oh.. I see.. Who than, were you talking about?" asked the jounin again. He really wanted it to sound more polite, but that would mean to add more words – and more words meant it was more likely to get him to cough.

He just hoped Iruka understood it and wouldn't be offended by his way of speech. He didn't want to be shouted on.

Iruka just chuckled again in his nervous way. "Well.. um... I was just thinking why is Genma-san not here.."

Hayate raised his eyebrow, cursing was kind of weird way to express someone absence.

"Well.. Hayate-san.. You looked like you needed to talk to me.. Can I help you somehow?" he asked politely, wondering if his two teammates were listening to the conversation. It didn't really matter, he would probably tell them anyway.

"Yes.. I needed to talk." he stopped to cough before taking deep breath. "I wanted your help." He noticed that Iruka didn't even think about the absence of 'ask for your help'. Was it because the chuunin wasn't so polite everyone thought?

"Carry on, Hayate-san." Iruka's voice interrupted him in his musings.

"Yes.. I heard about the prank someone put on Hatake Kakashi.." cough. His throat started to hurt again, maybe the chuunin will make him other tea, if he asked nicely? But with his need to shorten the sentences, it wouldn't really come out very nicely.

He looked up to see Iruka nervously scratching his scar. He shouldn't do that, it will just make it itch. That was, too, probably the reason the injury had scarred. If he had been scratching it, it hadn't have the time to heal properly.

"Eh.. yea.. well.. did it cause you any .. problems?" Iruka asked worriedly when the jounin kept silent for longer time. He took it as a clue to talk.

"No.." was Hayate's answer. He wanted to ask why did the teacher thought it would, but didn't want to talk that much. Iruka probably noticed that, because he answered his unspoken question:

"Well, that's good.. because Genma-san was little bit.. angry.. about it." Iruka hang his head. Genma wasn't just _angry_. Going by Kotetsu and Izumo, he was _furious_.

"Oh." Hayate nodded. That was.. predictable. Shiranui had had a mission with Hatake that day, after all.

"If that's not the thing, what did you wanted to discuss?" asked Iruka, looking slightly uncomfortable.

"I want to prank Anko."

"Why would you want to do that.." Iruka was careful. That was weird, to have a jounin asking for something like that.

"My reasons." was the short reply. It was too difficult to explain the difficult relationship between his fiancee, him and Mitarashi.

"I see.. so you want me – _us _to prank Anko." asked Iruka to be sure. It still sounded unbelievable. And by the weird shifts in his friends' chakra he found out that they really _were _listening, and did it found exactly ridiculous as him.

"Exactly."

"... Alright.. any special details?" He felt stupid. They weren't an association for pranks or anything. They didn't make them for anyone, just for their own excitement. But he just couldn't but say 'yes' to the sick jounin.

"No.."

"Ok.. I will do that. I can't talk for Ko, or Zumo, but I am in." The confused waves of chakra told him, his friends were in, too. No need to tell the jounin, though.

"Thank you Iruka-sensei. - Tell me how, and I will pay you back." wow, another quite long sentence. Hopefully he wouldn't need to talk anymore today, he would just go home and take warm bath, and drink warm tea and miss his lady.

Iruka thought for a moment, he didn't want the jounin to pay him back, but there was something he wanted to ask for anyway.

"Well.. there is one thing.." he started hesitantly, not knowing if he should.

Hayate nodded. That was good, he didn't want to be in debt to them.

"I want to be the one, who would be summoned by the genins in second part of this chuunin exam." he spilled it and carefully watched the jounin for anger of something like that, but it didn't come.

"As you wish."

* * *

><p>"That will be fun!" was Kotetsu's first sentence, after the jounin had left. He was really getting excited. Pranking Anko should be little bit dangerous, but even more promising.<p>

"Uhm.." agreed Izumo. "Do you have any idea how are we going to do that?"

Iruka, sitting next to Izumo, just because Kotetsu did have the habit of waving his arms when talking, shook his head. "I have one idea on a prank, I was working on one way of using chakra, but I wanted to spare it for Gai-san.." he mumbled. He was really working hard on that, and Anko would probably not appreciate it as much as Gai would.

"Than spare it for Gai.. we will think up something.." Izumo was always the one, who could say what was Iruka thinking. Not like Kotetsu didn't know him, and he wasn't ignorant either, he just didn't have it in himself to care. He was always energetic and ready-go-happy and always up to mischief.

There was a moment of silent, all of them thinking about the prank, and about the situations.

"We should just meet later today. The teams are going to be back soon, so we can't really talk about it now.." was Kotetsu's reply. His friends nodded.

"Where and when?" Iruka would want to go to the training field later in the evening, since his work was already done, so he would be able to move on with his training.

"In front of the Spider Nest at eight o'clock? We can as well go inside and train.."

"You think it still exist? We haven't been there since we graduated to chuunin.." Kotetsu sounded worried. Iruka shook his head – he and Izumo put a chakra into the small cave-building when they were building it. It would be difficult to destroy their hiding place, and it was probably undetectable, too, because Ibiki-sensei hadn't been able to find them – not even once.

"Okay, I guess it's a good idea.. I want to see if the scrolls are still alright.." mumbled Iruka.

Izumo grinned. "Yea.. and Ko can finally get his sausages back.." he teased happily. Iruka laughed and Kotetsu smacked Izumo's head lightly.

"And Iruka can show us what was he working on, so he was too busy to go out drinking with us." Iruka blushed and scratched the back of his head. He didn't want to neglect his teammates, but he really wanted to have it finished.

He decided it wouldn't hurt to have his two friends knowing – they would be able to help him, he was facing the problem of low chakra supply. He didn't have enough to make the jutsu last longer than two minutes.

"I agree.." was Iruka's hesitant answer, right when the first team – Team Gai – came inside of the mission room.

* * *

><p>The afternoon was over before they knew it without anything weird happening. Honestly, that fact was weird itself, but their shift was pleasantly boring and uneventful.<p>

Somewhere in the middle of that, Kotetsu got idea for the prank and now was silently grinning.

"Let's go?" asked Izumo and stood up from his chair – there was about one hour left, before they will be meeting again, and he wanted to take a shower and eat something. He guessed already, that Kotetsu would just invite himself, so he decided to ask anyway.

"Yeah.." came the tired response. It was just five o'clock, but there was already dark outside. And Kotetsu liked sun and warmth. He was always tired in days like this.

"See you in a few." said Iruka with mocking grin. He had the habit of looking like he _knew_. Anything and Everything. It was scary sometimes.

"What'cha planning?" Genma – who had been staying in the doorway for about fifteen minutes already, and nobody cared to notice him – asked with hint of curiosity.

"Nothing important, Genma-san." Iruka said pleasantly, while Kotetsu with Izumo escaped the room, forcing the jounin to step aside for them to go through the door. He didn't mind letting them go – he still had Iruka to ask questions. And he wasn't going to let it pass, after all, he was _supposed_ to know everything about his fellow shinobis.

Genma just raised his eyebrows to his answer. Nothing important, right. He took a step towards the teacher, intently watching him. "And were you ignoring me, Iruka-_kun_?" was his another question, when he remembered that any of the chuunin wasn't surprised by his voice. And he didn't like being ignored.

Iruka snorted. "Why would we – or I – do so, Genma-san?" he asked sweetly. He just enjoyed making the older man angry.

"You tell me.." yes, he was definitely angry now. His brows were furrowed and he was chewing on his needle almost violently. Iruka suddenly remembered the last time Genma was angry on them.

"Oh.. I wanted to apologize." he spoke silently, almost whispering and Genma had to take a step closer to hear him.

"What for?" was his confused reply.

Iruka hang his head down, looking embarrassed. "For the prank on Kakashi-sensei.." he whispered and carefully watched as Genma's eyes widened. "Please forgive me!" he said more loudly and bowed to the jounin. It was expected from him. He was a chuunin. And he angered a jounin. He didn't have the nerve to let it just pass like Kotetsu or Izumo would do.

Before the jounin could say something Iruka flew past him and ran away, leaving dumbstruck Genma standing there.

* * *

><p>It was windy, another early call of the autumn. Even when the air was still warm, nights were cold and the wind coming from west was chilly. The Konoha shinobi liked to joke about the wind coming from the Wind country – they say it is the Kazekage sending them their <em>warm <em>love.

Izumo sighed and pulled his scarf closer to himself, he was cold. He knew that Kotetsu next to him was feeling the same – going by the way he was shaking.

"Damn that _teacher_. Where _is_ he?" whispered Izumo and watched with fascination the white smoke what was coming from his mouth. He couldn't believe it. Iruka was late. For almost twenty minutes.

"Probably got stuck with Genma, he looked like he had a _lot_ to ask." answered Kotetsu with a smirk.

"I guess.." Izumo sighed. Yea, Iruka probably had a good reason, the problem was, they wouldn't be able to enter the Spider Nest without him.

Kotetsu turned around, his back facing the narrow forest path and ran his hand over few invisible pictures on the small rock. He felt them under his fingers and could taste the chakra going trough the stone. It was answering to his touch, nicely warm, sweet and familiar, yet unknown.

It was their chakra from when they were kids – mixed together. His, Izumo's and Iruka's.

There was a sound of leaves crushing against heavy boots and Kotetsu jerked away from the stone. He felt like he was caught in something .. inappropriate.

"Hey! Sorry I am late.." greeted Iruka when he jogged closer to them. He had chosen not to use normal shinobi way of a travel – trees – and instead he had been running the whole way. It was surprisingly nice.

"It's ok.." Izumo smiled, while Kotetsu just gritted something between his teeth. He felt even colder now, when he wasn't touching the chakra source.

"Let's come inside.." Iruka smiled and stood in line with Kotetsu, laying his tanned hand on the stone. He could see his two friends staying side by side next to him and doing the same. At the beginning it was the formation with him in the middle, having Kotetsu on his right and Izumo on his left, but after some time their chakra moved, so he had to switch his place with Izumo.

Iruka closed his eyes and started searching for his own chakra, feeling lightly the presence of two other minds. He found thin and long string of the red energy, and gave it a shock of his own. The string lightened for a second, before disappearing and appearing again, in another shade. It was now more like purple, than red.

Iruka gasped when the energy pushed him away and he fell to the ground, distantly hearing someone rolling away, so he wouldn't fall on them.

"What the.. what _was_ that?" was heard from his right, and he could only guess by the language, that it was Izumo. He couldn't hear clearly from the banging in his head.

"How the hell should I know?" Kotetsu.

Iruka gasped for air, he knew he would be able to explain to them. If he just will catch his breath.

Few minutes passed in silence.

"It was our own chakra. Did you notice it was different, when we parted?" Iruka asked, his voice almost even.

"Yes." Kotetsu did. He was good with chakra, he wasn't able to see it in colors, but he could feel it.

"No. No I didn't!" Izumo was frowning. "Was it different?"

Iruka nodded. He hadn't known it was even possible until now. "I guess we just.. changed a bit. Our personality is different, our chakra control is, too. That's why it was like this. The chakra we left here didn't recognize us as the same."

"Wouldn't it be problem? We can't get inside.."

"Nah.. Sure we can." Kotetsu smiled. "Ruka said it was different when we parted. The chakra adapted to our current self. We can go inside right now."

And like he said; instead of ordinary stone there was a hole in the hill, leading to large cave.

Izumo smiled happily and jumped to his feet. He pulled Kotetso up and offered his hand to Iruka, too, but the teacher was already waiting for them by the entrance.

"I just hope, Zumo, that you remember the way trough the labyrinth." Iruka chuckled and took a torch from the cave wall. He muttered some word and the torch flared up – he didn't even need to do the hand's signs, to light something was a jutsu he learned when he was a pre-genin.

"Oh, _Let there be – Light_!" declared Kotetsu and clapped his hands.

"Shut up."

"You hurt my feelings.."

"You have a feelings? That's new."

"This joke is old.."

"As is Sandaime-sama and you still listen to him."

"Oh well, leave it for teachers to have the last word.."

Izumo decided that the best way how to make them stop their bickering was just to start going. He stole the torch from Iruka and took a few steps in front of them. He counted in his head and prayed, he didn't jumble the directions up.

_23 steps then turn left_. He took the correct directions on the crossways, waiting for his friends to catch up with him. He couldn't let them die in the labyrinth, as much as he would sometimes like to do that.

_52 steps, light climbing up, then trough a hole in the floor._ He gave the torch to Kotetsu and climbed down – the hole was little bit shallower than he remembered – than waited for them to join him, holding the source of light himself.

_13 steps down, turn left 9 steps then turn left again and walk until the stream._ He could hear Iruka almost stepping to the freezing water and grinned. The last time they walked this path, they all did fall there. He took few more steps and heard loud splash. Well, Iruka didn't; Kotetsu did.

_After the stream turn right and take 54 steps, then take the darker path._ He turned left and passed the wider corridor with carved stairs and some weird stones. He knew he should wonder about it – how come there were stairs in the middle of nothing? How come the weird stones were producing light? And he probably should have paid more attention to his soaked friend, Kotetsu hated cold, after all, and he knew it. But he was living the memories, he was taking the same steps as he was when they all were fourteen, he felt like the little child he was back than.

_37 steps then right – after then go: right-left-left-right-left-right-left-left. The door._

He stood in front of the wooden door like so many times before. He raised his arm and ran his fingers along the thin lines of carved picture of spider.

He took one of it's legs and pushed it, making one stone on the left of him to move away, leaving just a tiny hole in the stone there.

The _keyhole._

How come he forgot about it?

How could he forget that _he _was the one carrying the key?

His slightly insane laugh echoed trough the cave complex while he bit his finger and used his blood to unlock the monumental door in front of him.

* * *

><p>"Have you ever thought that the passage here can be dangerous?" asked Iruka, now comfortably sitting on a fluffy pillow, Izumo had once stolen it at home, with other things, saying, it would make their <em>nest<em> more home-y.

"What do you mean?" asked Kotetsu, looking trough some scroll. It was something he wrote when he was about 9 and it was kinda funny to see, how was he thinking back then.

Iruka scratched his head awkwardly. "Well.. you see.. it looks like some old temple or something. Just.. look around, the walls, the stairs.. the door.. and the ornaments." he was frowning now. "Someone made really hard job to built it like this.."

Izumo looked up from his own book and raised an eyebrow. "We didn't find anyone. And we didn't even find _anything_ left by them, other then the ornaments and the.. cave itself." he said soothingly. Really, why was his friend so afraid now? They had had the same conversation once before.

_"What if there is someone inside?" asked nine-years old Izumo and tried to hide behind his taller friends. Iruka looked around to see him and gave him a cheeky grin._

_"Do you see.. or _feel_ anyone, rabbit?" he asked teasingly and chuckled when Izumo pouted on his new nickname._

_"Um.. n..no.." he said hesitantly. He really didn't feel any presence, other then his, Iruka's and Kotetsu's._

_"I thought so.." mumbled Iruka happily and poked Kotetsu, who was busy looking around the cave entrance and trying to light up the torch._

_Izumo was still hiding behind him, frowning, he realized. Iruka turned around to see him again._

_"Hey, no one is here, other then us. And we are here together, we won't let anything happen to you, rabbit." Iruka smiled reassuringly and ruffled his friend's hair._

_Izumo nodded and smiled back._

"I know that.. It's just.. we didn't even look to the others rooms, we don't know what is there.." Iruka said.

"You were the one who said it's better to let sleep everything we don't understand." said Izumo softly. Iruka looked up and they let their eyes connect, have a silent conversation like they had been used to. Finally Iruka nodded.

"Sooo... what about the prank?" asked Kotetsu suddenly, looking up from the scroll. He realized something was amiss with his friends.

"Yea.. you said you had an idea.." said Izumo lazily.

"Did I?" teased Kotetsu. Izumo hit him over his head.

"Itai." the black haired shinobi pouted.

"Spill it, Neko~" said Iruka and went to sit down next to Kotetsu, motioning to Izumo to do the same.

"Well.. it was kinda stupid.. really.." Kotetsu said nervously. Izumo just raised an eyebrow.

"Don't do that.." mumbled Kotetsu. Izumo did it again. "You look like freaking Uchiha.."

Izumo laughed. "Oka. Spill the idea. Now." he ordered and poked his friend.

"Right. I thought we would just make some.. gossip for lack of other words .. and let it spread around the village." he explained.

"It's not much of a prank.." said Izumo frowning.

"I guess not." Iruka nodded. "But we just need to take a revenge on Anko. Not necessary does it have to be a prank."

Kotetsu smiled. "Well.. that's the idea. If you agree, it will be easy just to let Genma spread it. Let him _accidentally_ hear something about Anko and wait how it would end."

"Sound easy enough.." mumbled Izumo. He really didn't like gossips, but he wouldn't stop them. They wanted to get a revenge on the loud woman, for some reason even they didn't know, and he wouldn't be the one getting in their way. He knew better.

"Alright, that sounds like a plan!" cheered Iruka. "Now just to get something to say about her."

Kotetsu thought for a moment. "What about.. she is a traitor?"

"No. We don't want to _hurt_ her. We just want to make fun of her." Iruka said sternly and Izumo sighed in relief. Thanks Kami the teacher didn't find it a good idea. Because it wasn't. Wasn't a good idea.

"We will not say she's traitor, neither she is hiding missing nin, neither she is Uchiha Madara in guise, and don't even think about saying she is waiting Orochimaru's baby or something." Iruka continued in his teacher voice, making sure his friend wouldn't do anything cruel.

"Wait." Kotetsu said and started to grin.

"No." hissed Izumo, fearing which of the ideas got Ko's attention.

"No,no.. don't worry." said Kotetsu hurriedly. "Not planing on doing anything from that.. it's just.." he smiled.

"What?" asked Iruka, while Izumo just raised his eyebrow. He remembered how Kotetsu told him that it looked kinda Uchiha-like and thought about freaking his friend with making the "hn" noise next time.

"Well.. we can say she is pregnant." he titled his head. "Not with Orochimaru, of course. It's gross. But just.. like that." he grinned again and watched Iruka starting to smile.

Izumo felt like banging his head to the nearest wall._ Great idea, Kotetsu, really great. You should write it to the book "How to create a shinobi Village hidden in the Insanity". _he thought to himself.

"It's true, that it will make people wonder.." said Iruka slowly. "I am in!" he made a Gai's Good-guy-Pose with raised thumb just to humor himself.

"It's decided than." Kotetsu grinned and high-fived the teacher. "And now it's time, Ruka, my little dolphin, for you to show us what you were working on."

Izumo strained himself, carefully listening. He was curious. More than he would ever admit. "It better be something good, for you to abandon us for so long.." he mumbled with a little threat. "Or else I will proclaim _you_ a traitor." he added seriously and Iruka nervously scratched his scar.

"Eh.. hehe.. alright. Let's get on with it." he said and stood up, taking few steps from them to make himself some space.

He thought for a moment to find the best way how to explain and automatically switched to his teacher-mode.

"I will go step-by-step for you to understand my thoughts how I started with this idea." both his friends nodded.

"Alright. First of all was the Henge no Jutsu." he said and for demonstration changed himself into Sarutobi's replica. "Now, the second idea was with the 'kai' you use to escape someone's genjutsu."

"Right. We both know these two, every shinobi do, I just can't see how do you plan on combine them." mumbled Izumo watching their ex-hokage scratch his non-existent scar.

"I don't." explained the hokage and henged himself back to his twenty five years old form. "I was just .. interested in the way you can with the 'kai' wake up yourself, as you can wake up someone other, too." he took a deep breath. "So I was thinking if I would be able to henge someone else.. I tried it. And found out, I can." he smirked and made the seals for the henge, than touched Kotetsu's forehead. Suddenly before him was sitting Sarutobi, looking slightly disturbed.

"I see.." mumbled Izumo and poked the hokage. Iruka changed him back.

"It's the same way as if working with 'kai'. You are using your chakra and reversing it's speed and way to mach to the one you are changing, than transporting it to his body."

Izumo made the seals and touched Ko's forehead as Iruka had done few seconds ago, but nothing happened.

Iruka smiled. "It took me about month to master it, and another one to be able to do that from a distance." he made the seals and let Kotetsu change to Sarutobi once again, taking few breaths and making him take the form of Yondaime hokage, then changing him into Tsunade.

Izumo gasped. "You can change his form again and again?" Iruka nodded.

Kotetsu made a seal for 'kai' but he wasn't able to turn to his own form.

"It's reversible just by mine own 'kai'." he explained while turning Kotetsu back.

"It's kinda weird, knowing you can change me every time you want.." he said.

"You can use it in a battle, you know.. like changing your enemy into innocent little rabbit or something.." said Izumo.

"Hmm.. The only innocent little rabbit here is you, and I wouldn't want to fight you." teased Iruka and ducked before the pen Izumo threw would hit him. "And I would've to know the enemy's chakra signature to do so, not talking about the fact, that it's tiring." he explained.

"Well, but it's still good to confuse the enemy. You can join the Interrogation. Ibiki-sensei would be honored." smirked Kotetsu.

"Nah, thanks." Iruka rolled his eyes. "He already asked me three times."

"You can always teach him the little trick."

"I guess.. but. This is the first part. The second part is more difficult." His friends nodded to show him, they were listening.

"You know how your chakra react to your surroundings, right?"

"Yeah.." Kotetsu said and Izumo nodded.

"Well.. your chakra can react to chakra of other shinobi, or people, who are around you, so you can adapt it to their. You can even make your chakra to adapt to other one's itself and change."

"No. We can't." frowned Izumo. "You can, but just because you are from another village. _We_ can't do that, Iruka." he said turning serious. That was something he hated – how Iruka was able to change his chakra signature. It was sneaky and scary and he hated how much his friend resembled a chameleon while doing so.

"Oh. I see.. Sorry. I can do that. But you both understand the basic principle, right?"

Both nodded.

"Well, I was thinking about combining these two little facts.. So that the Henge no Jutsu would react to everyone whose chakra is close enough."

"So you basically say, you can put a henge no jutsu on someone – you said it would be Gai, right? – and make him change his form every time he passes someone?"

Iruka nodded. "Yea, like that."

"So.. what's the problem with that?" asked Kotetsu carefully. He guessed there was something wrong, otherwise they would have pranked Gai long time ago.

"Um.. I was thinking about making it both-sided. So that the one Guy will turn into, will turn into the last image Gai had."

"Like.. Gai meets Kurenai – Gai changes into Kurenai and Kurenai changes into Gai. Gai continues on his little walk as Kurenai and meet... umm.. Kakashi. Gai changes into Kakashi and Kakashi changes into Kurenai. Like this?" asked Izumo with raised eyebrow.

"Yes. That way it would be more fun."

"Well.. and Kurenai will than change, too?"

"No.. it will stop after few minutes, she will change back and every effect will leave her.. Until she meets Gai again."

"For Gai it will look like he is switching bodies." Kotetsu smirked. "So, what _is_ the problem with it?"

Iruka sighed. He hoped they would be able to help him. "It require _my_ chakra the whole time, some chakra on Gai, so he will change to everyone he meets, and still enough so it can change them, too. And I don't have enough chakra supply for it to last more than two minutes." he explained.

"So why don't you just use Gai's chakra? You can reverse their chakra to _your _speed and not the other way around." Kotetsu said.

"Because if Iruka did this, their chakra would be like _his._ It would be like making his little chakra-clones." Izumo answered before Iruka could even breath in.

The teacher nodded. That was the basic problem. He watched his friends thinking about the problem. He already knew they would think about giving him his own chakra, but it wouldn't be enough, still. It will last – with their chakra, too – for about fifteen minutes or something.

"You can connect your chakra with mine and Kotetsu's." Izumo frowned concentrating. "More like – Ko can connect our chakra together, so you will be able to use our supplies, too." Iruka nodded.

"I know that.. but that will give us .. I think fifteen minutes."

"Twelve." Kotetsu mumbled silently.

"What?" asked Izumo. What was his friend talking about? He counted it, too, before he said it, and got to fifteen minutes, as Iruka. How come Kotetsu got only twelve?

Kotetsu sighed. "It's because you are both counting with the connection we had before – while we were kids, and like you said, Iruka, our chakra signature changed. We all developed our secondary element." he said seriously.

Iruka nodded. He knew about the element, and knew that Kotetsu with Izumo realized it too, he just didn't get why it should change their connection.

"It's because our elements were fire:lightning:earth when we first tried to connect ourselves. When _I _first tried to connect us together. Listen – I thought it is impossible to connect these three, before, but I once found a logical connection between them, and than, after I realized it, I was able to do so. Because _lightning_ can burn _earth. _It can put _earth _to _fire._ So I was some rope between you two, while we were trying it."

Izumo thought about it. It didn't make sense. Yea, maybe lightning can do so, but he guessed it worked just because Ko believed it. The think that confused him, was the fact, that in their group, first _Iruka_ was their connection, and than it was himself. Like Ko put it, it would make sense if it was him.

He said it out loud, but Kotetsu just laughed. "That has nothing to do with chakra."

"Alright, you say that you were able to connect us, because you found a connection between the three elements, and you can do it still, but it will be weaker, because we all developed another element.."

Kotetsu nodded again. "That's the idea. I guess our chakra signature must have changed, too.."

"Yes, it did." Iruka said suddenly. He remembered the color of his chakra string. "Mine chakra was red, when we were kids, now it is purple."

"It figures – you were fire type, and you got a hold on water jutsu. Red and blue is purple." said Kotetsu cheekily. "Mine was probably silver-blue and now is.. silver-blue still." he stuck his tongue out.

"Why do you think?" Iruka asked raising his eyebrows.

Kotetsu groaned. "Not you too.." Izumo winked to Iruka and they both laughed. "And I thought – lightning is something between silver and blue, right? And wind is blue.. or white, if you wish.. so.." he smiled.

"More to purple, too. But that's not important. So we would still be able to hold the jutsu for twelve minutes with our chakra supply. That's not enough."

"I can always try and find another connection.. It shouldn't be so difficult, after all, you and Zumo have both water, so.." Kotetsu shrugged.

"No." Izumo interrupted him. "Even than we would have fifteen minutes, it's still not enough, we need at least half an hour, so that Gai will meet at least three people."

"Well, we are back to the original problem. The only think we did was realize, we all changed colors." Kotetsu rolled his eyes.

Izumo sighed. Why didn't they let him finish what he was saying? "It's not what I was talking about." he said irritated. "If you would be able to connect me with Iruka, I would be able to give him the energy from around." he said with roll of his eyes.

Before his friends tried to say something, Izumo continued:

"Ko will just have to connect us together, and I will transfer some chakra from the woods to you, it will be enough for it to last for more than five hours, before I pass away from it." he said happily. He would just go to sit and meditate somewhere in the woods, probably to the forbidden training area, where the nature was strong, and trough Kotetsu send the chakra to Iruka.

"It's not bad idea.." Iruka mumbled. "I will have to be close to Gai to activate the jutsu and make sure it works right – in that time I will have to use just mine chakra, because it would be too dangerous to transfer chakra trough the village. I will take the path towards you, Zumo, but I will have to meet Ko in the middle – I don't know how long it will take me to find you, and I don't want to pass out. He will start with transferring his chakra towards me, and we – still keeping the jutsu – will go and join you. Kotetsu will than start the connection with you and we will just wait there as long as we want."

"Alright, when do we plan on prank Gai?" was Kotetsu's question.

"I would say.. two weeks after the Anko-prank?"

"Sounds like a plan to me." Kotetsu gave them his grin and tried to, too, imitate Gai's Good-guy-Pose.

Izumo inwardly smirked and said: "Hn."

There was a moment of silent, before Iruka interrupted it with a roar of laugh, the face his friend gave almost killed him. Kotetsu threw a pillow to Izumo and they started a pillow fight.

After about ten minutes the pillow fight slowly turned to training session and all of the chuunin got home few minutes after two in the morning.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading, I hope you liked it (:<br>Thousand Foot Krutch - The Art of Breaking; Budhistic Mantra called Om Mani Padme Hum (If you didn't guess, these are songs I was listening while writting this catastrophe, try to listen to them?)**


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